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Every Seeker’s experience is absolutely unique |
I get lot of emails about various spiritual
experiences seekers have during meditation. Some of them are listed here. There is a common thread behind all these divine experiences - called Yogic
Kriya which is absolutely scientific.
The universe of Yogic Kriya is a phenomenon beyond human imagination and mind-boggling
at the least for an average individual.
Every Sadhak (spiritual practitioner) in the path of Siddha Yoga will have different experiences during meditation (and some may not have any). They all are categorized as Kriyas.
There are more than 125,000 types of Kriyas or spiritual experiences one can have.
When you read the divine experiences listed below you will realize they are so different
from each other. There is absolutely no similarity between them what-so-ever. You
can also see some
Kriyas in action - in amazing Kriya videos
Some experiences can be categorized as weird, some are unusual, some are so inexplicable
while others can be absolutely frightening. But all of them are generally Blissful
and they are unbelievable for
a person who does not know Siddha Yoga.
Even for a Siddha Yoga practitioner they are absolutely confusing and misleading
most of the times. Many Sadhaks don’t understand the science behind the Kriyas. The
Kriyas make Siddha Yoga a
supreme Yoga science - “Jewel in the Crown” of Yogas.
All Kriyas are meant to achieve the same goal - cleaning of our physiological blocks
as Kundalini energy moves
through 72,000 Nadis (subtle energy channels carrying Prana) in our
spiritual body. I always suggest my visitors that all these
experiences must be ignored. Experiences are not the Goal and there is a
bigger battle to fight as sadhak travels to the higher plain in this enjoyable path
of Kundalini Yoga.
Experiences are only ment to achieve specific type
of purification necessary for the aspirant at his/her respective stage. All experiences
entirely depend on the "spiritual status" of the Sadhak (combination of Sanchita
Karma, Samskaras and Tri-gunas). In short – consider all experiences as “signs”
on the road to the divine. We never fall in love with any sign on the road, Do we?
Sadhak’s role should be of an observer in case of all “Divine” experiences. They will come and go, Yogis should not get involved in them. Read more at -
Who can attain Self-Realization or Moksha?
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Blissful, Beautiful and Nice-to-have
Experiences |
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I see a golden pot with 2 leaves |
Of late I see golden pot with 2 leaves expanding on sides and coconut like substance
above the pot - What is it? Am I on wrong direction or is it my mental formation?
This question has been answered here
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My husband saw Prakash (light) of thousands of lights everywhere for continue 3 days |
The day after I had my Shaktipat Deeksha from Shaktipat Guru, my husband noticed the Prakash (light) of thousands of lights everywhere for continue 3 days that you have already mentioned.
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Huge source of "brightness" (cannot comprehend it's size by words) |
In 2008 I took Siddha Samadhi Yoga classes in USA. When I had this class taken over
two weekends, there was an extremely strong pulse of energy taking hold, between
my eye brows. When inquired with the teacher, she suggested that it is common to
have such experience. In the same year I was doing meditation using the CDs, which
was of immense experience. There were two strong energy pulses felt, one at the
sitting bottom end, and the other between my eye brows. One experience while doing
the meditation after listening to the CD, was astounding. As if a small cold breeze
were to be blown in a space from the top of my head, through the neck and into the
spine and to the bottom of my back. This was so astounding. I haven't had the repeat
of the same later on. One of the astounding experiences was, about 6 to 8 months
ago. I was just slipping into sleep after meditating, when there was a huge source
of "brightness" (cannot comprehend it's size by words) that was emerging from bottom
of my closed eyes. I know it was not the "normal lights" or even the "day light"
that we are all used to. It was so calming and attractive. This experience was for
a fraction of a second, but I was speechless. Good number of times, I feel like
I am not driving the car, even when I am driving the car. There is a clear detachment
of my "Subtle Self" from body, and I can see the body driving the car and I am just
going with the body. Very strange and unexplained experiences.
This has been explained here
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Muscle contraction from anus and I lose control of my body and mind |
As I wrote earlier there is strong muscle contraction from anus and I lose control
of my body and mind and very blissful experience happens but it is short lived. I crave
for more and it comes of its own and I think and feel that surrender is the only
way out. I cannot write in thousand words the bliss that I undergo during and after.
Thanks for the right guidance and article of
five headed Cobra. I am sharing this
with you for the reason that if I lose the sight of life’s' real goal, I can be
corrected.
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I'm surrounded by deep bright light, Lightning bolt rising up, Waves of ecstasy
rising throughout my body |
I am 20 year old. I started practicing Yoga before 2 years. I used to worship Lord
Shiva. I used to go to Shiva Temple most days. I had a strange feeling one day that
I can't look at the Vigraha in temple, at that time I can sense some sort of powerful
waves of energy moving towards my head it continued for few days later it stopped,
and I had a strange dream that I heard a strong sound of OM. Repeating, waves of
ecstasy were rising throughout my body, I feel chills all over me. Later I started
practicing the Panjakashari Mantra for 40 days 125,000 repetitions, after that I
feel myself deeply immersed when I'm meditating and high awareness and deep trance
states. Most of that time I meditate I'm surrounded by deep bright white light,
Chills all over my body like a Lightning bolt rising up, and waves of electricity
in crown chakra area. Can you tell me about this? I'm interested in knowing about
it.
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I sense one Holy Spiritual personality sitting beside me |
This month I started to perform Agnihotra (Vedic Yagnya - healing fire) daily. I
sense one Holy Spiritual personality sitting beside me while Pooja. It's great.
I can't see, only feel. Can I get Darshan (auspicious vision) of that Divine?
This question has been answered here
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Lot of Yoga are happening on its own combined with songs |
I got initiated by Guru Siyag 30 days ago & practicing Siddha Yoga since then.
I am praying for 15 min meditation but it is happening for 1 hour and 15 minutes.
Lot of Yoga and Asanas (Yogic postures) are happening on its own (without me doing
them) during each session. Yoga happens sometimes combined with songs. Once I said
Gayatri Mantra, and shouted during meditation.
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Intense pressure at the crown of my head, I feel like I'm in a vacuum |
I have been meditating for 15 years. The last few years I have increased my practice,
every day, twice per day for at least 30-45 minutes. The last few weeks I have been
experiencing intense pressure at the crown of my head. Also, am hearing some type
of bells, I feel like I'm in a vacuum. What does this mean?
This questions has been answered here
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Bizarre, Amazing, and Unbelievable
Experiences |
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Anaconda (Kundalini Shakti), Jaguar (You) and Condor (higher consciousness/Shiva) |
Just to say Mahendra that your website is beautiful and your insight invaluable
to me, Thank you so much, I return time and time again. Kundalini came into my heart
recently, scary, but wondrous beyond words.
I would like to share a small story of my adventures with you. The day before Kundalini
came I dreamed of a giant anaconda fighting a jaguar. I had assumed that the snake
was kundalini which of course she was, but now I also realise she was also Ayahuasca,
the Peruvian mother plant Goddess. In Peruvian spirituality there is a trinity,
anaconda, jaguar and condor. The anaconda is Kundalini Shakti, the jaguar you, and
the condor higher consciousness/Shiva. My dream showed the awakening Kundalini struggling
with my ego self. Anyway last year I was absolutely guided by the divine to go to
Peru and take Ayahuasca, it involved the healing of a family member, it was an emergency
and I just did what had to be done. Ayahuasca is an entheogen, but don't think she
is a drug, this is just not the case and for the record I have never even smoked
a joint! I have to say that Ayahuasca is a profoundly spiritual and healing force,
I can only describe her as plant Kundalini. She acts as a spiritual cleaner, like
a broom through the Chakras and Nadis. I went to a pace called Ayahuasca Satsangha
where it is recognized that Yoga a Peruvian shamanism are complimentary spiritual
paths. As a Kundalini person my experience was exceptional, she went straight up
my spine into my third eye, I actually found myself in the great cathedral of my
pineal gland and saw the soul ascending. Interestingly Ganesh came to me, he put
me on his back and removed all obstacles from my path. The next night I went to
Shiva. Shiva was a state of consciousness vast and unimaginable. I thought I was
going to die but in fact I was facing ego dissolution and just not ready. Some months
later I returned to Peru and Ayahuasca. The first night I drank I went straight
to Shiva, I saw that all was in the Shivaic body, I saw Shiva resting his head on
the earth whilst shooting stars fell upon him. Then I merged with Shiva, stars poured
into my crown chakra and I entered into a Samadhi. A very interesting point is that
there was an Indian girl there, a Muslim, a famous Sufi singer. Despite being Muslim,
Shiva and other Hindu deities also came to her. Make of that what you will! The
profound spiritual cleansing of the Ayahuasca has resulted in the recent penetration
of my heart by Kundalini, quite scary but beautiful, I nearly passed out when I
found my self in the space of the heart.
Many thanks as always!
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Divine energy is quite friendly but adamant, putting me thru physical exercises
like backward fast walking, circular running |
Two years ago while reading Soundaryalahari with meaning, I fell in deep love with
Arthanareswara. Since then I started dedicating all my deeds to the God. During
my morning prayers, I used to see Maa Kali in different forms. I started doing Manaspuja
and meditation with Shiv Panchakshari chant. Some divine form used to guide me and
encourage me. This went on for three months. I even used to meditate three times
a day, starting with 3 am. One early morning electricity went up thru my spine to
where I really couldn't make out, but I was scared to the core. After that day I
started seeing Chamundeswari even in the middle of my sleep. Motor like current
started up and down from my head. I started getting signals from inside that I should
move my body in certain postures, so that the energy could manifest. From then onwards
my meditation is no more.
The energy started making me do Maha Mudrasana and fish posture and even Vipareeta
Karani on the bed in the middle of the night. She is very jubilant and very vibrant
full of surprises. Suddenly she started Yoga Mudras. My hands and body were forcefully
controlled by the energy into constant Mudras and postures. This ritual went on
for three days. She used to communicate with me thru hand mudras. One night, after
big Mudra ritual, she went into my head. That day onwards I started hearing Mantras
and voices from within. Thought I was possessed by someone. I stopped doing Puja
and was even scared of God. She even started kind of Reikhi healing. I felt intruded
and intoxicated and very very scared to even look at myself in the mirror.
One night a beautiful voice from within my heart advised me to keep my mind creative
all the time and do Mantra chanting. It took me three months to come out of my own
fears and hallucinations. I never knew that there was so much unnecessary stuff
inside me. Now in the present situation the divine energy is quite friendly but
adamant. Whenever I do Puja she puts Mudras like Sankshobhini etc. Since I did not
know whom to talk to, I was going thru lots of spiritual books and discourses. Now
my problem is divine energy is putting me thru physical exercises like backward
fast walking, circular running (makes me very giddy). My sleep is very little. My
mind is not able to concentrate like before in meditation. I am unable to do shiv
Manaspuja with devotion. Please advise me. Think I lost my orientation.
This has been answered in a similar thread here
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Cool electricity shot up my spine. She twists my head in all directions.
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I am 52 years old doing regular Pooja and Kali Mantra chanting. While painting Maa
Kali, my hands used to tremble. I started getting motor like vibrations from somewhere
inside my body. During one meditation, Cool electricity shot up my spine. I was
sick for three months with all kinds of digestion problems. Then the energy physically
manifested through mudras consoling like human. Later spiritual energy went into
my head. She twists my head in all directions. I still paint deities. Should I change
my life in anyway in order to progress in meditation? I try to surrender to the
energy as much as possible. I am not aware of any spiritual Guru. Nor can I visit
one personally due to my personal problems. My wife works in IT and has a spinal
cord problem. She is blessed with extreme intelligence in her field. We manage difficulties
in his health condition through God’s grace. Please advise.
Answer: You don’t need to do anything other than continuing your
regular Pooja and Sadhana. I don’t think the Kundalini Kiryas will trouble you more
than what you have experienced so far. Twisting of head and shooting of energy is
fine as long as you manage the balance. All other signs are okay too. You do not
need Guru and Maa Kali is your Ishta Devata. Kundalini is your Guru.
To have cooling effect please try to use more of dairy products. If your trouble
increases in anyway please following link. Your may need little bit of Kali Sadhana.
More details are in the page.
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Yesterday I found myself speaking in Bengali. I had never been to Bengal in my lifetime. |
Yesterday, I found myself speaking in Bengali and was probably landlord there. I
had never been to Bengal in my lifetime. Is it my past birth? Confused because I
was fluent in Bengali during the experience while I do not know ABC of it..Godess
Kali was worshiped in my home temple. I am totally confused. Please guide.
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I have bizarre Masturbation in meditation |
I am a practitioner of Siddha Yoga for last 15 years. My Guru is my father who had
taken Siddha Yoga Deeksha from a Sadhvi (female sadhu who has renounced the worldly
life) in Gujarat in 1980. After seeing my curiosity my father gave me Siddha Yoga
Deeksha at home. Initially I had many Kriyas like shaking, Swaying of body, Kpakpana
(vibrations), Kumbhak (pause in every breath), Rechak (exhaling air) and Hath Yoga
began happening involuntarily. But because of my education I could not pay much
attention towards the Sadhana (spiritual practice) and I left it after 2 years.
Since past 15 years I started Siddha Yoga again and the Kriya Yoga started where
I left years back. But this time Maa Kali Mantra (mystic divine words formula) started
happening on its own during Dhyan (meditation). The Mantra I chant is “OM Rhim Klim
Chamunday Vicche”. Various Mudras (gesture or position, usually of the hands) and
Kumbhak happen rapidly on every Vowel and Consonant of Mantra, and the continuity
Persists.
After the Mantra Yoga (Maa Kali Mantra above) I start making various sounds like
that of Lion, Damru (power drum), dog and sometimes elephants. Then I enter into
a bizarre sexual experience. Hsthmathun (Masturbation) starts happening on its own
and stops before the ejaculation (ejection of semen or orgasm). Thereafter, I don’t
have any sexual desire to carry it further. Then I literally experience the blissful
feeling. I see a round Sun in various colors. Sometimes a glowing or black spot
emerges at the center of the colorful sun, it grows and disappears. Then I get a
feeling of extreme peace that spreads all around me. I never know how long I remain
in that blissful Samadhi state. After a while, when the consciousness returns, I
experience a feeling of intoxication (drunkenness - not being in my senses) in my
eyes. Feeling of intoxication disappears after sometime and then I get back to my
routine.
I am confused. What is all this?
This question has been answered here
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Body started shaking, I felt some electric shock like feeling |
When I visit temples and see God Murtis (idols) I start to weep. It is very difficult
for me to control weeping. When I visited ISKON Temple recently my whole body started
shaking. I felt some electric shock like feeling. My head felt compressed and uncontrolled
tears started flowing from my eyes.
This question has been answered here
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I nearly fell down |
Presently Kundalini Kriyas are on constantly as I feel jumps in my spine to my throat.
Sometimes during the jump is so powerful that I awake from sleep. That is the grace
of hers and my gratefulness only to whatever is happening. My son was previously
as once while watching jump coming and I nearly fell down. My family members are
aware that nothing is wrong with me. One of the evolved Sadhak had told me that
my sub-conscious mind will create hindrance once I will start reaching higher. He
also told that for indefinite time I had been slave of unconscious mind and it knows
everything. Naturally it will not allow me freedom from slavery. I am grateful to
you for kind words.
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Experiences after Self-Awakened Kundalini |
Brendon Ring (currently living in a remote place in the Europe) is one of those
few people whose Kundalini had
awakened in absence of a Shaktipat Guru. Interestingly Brendan has
traveled a distance in the path of Siddha Yoga
without guidance of a physical Guru.
His Kundalini awakened because of his efforts from
the past life rather than a Shaktipat Deeksha in the current life.
Read 3 methods of awakening – Shaktipat, Meditation, Self-Awakening
Brendan’s Diving experiences in his own words.
Dear Mahendra
Thank you for taking the time to write such a
detailed and informative reply.
I would like to share with you in a bit more detail my experience so far.
I started doing yoga as a child, looking back it was actually quite advanced yoga,
at age nine I was doing sutra neti everyday. It is quite an experience for a child
to be taken into a bathroom by an old yogi and have a rubber tube inserted up their
nostril and pulled out their mouth! At this tine also my aunt who lived in the states
became deeply involved in Siddha yoga. She gave me many books to read about the
Himilayan and Tibetan yogis. So by the age of 12 I was steeped in both yoga and
spiritual literature.
About age 12 I started playing music and this became my life and I left yoga behind,
but I feel now that this childhood yoga and the presence of my aunt as a spiritual
teacher were significant.
The musical life can be very unhealthy and in my case involved a lot of alcohol
and ego. About 3 years ago age 39 I found myself very unhappy. Whilst on holiday
in Bali I took a yoga class and it was like coming home, I knew everything in the
class and from then on resumed after 30 years the practice of yoga.
I initially did kundalini yoga sets to strengthen my body but became increasingly
drawn to meditation. I eventually settled on sodarshan chakra kriya as my sole practice.
After a few months I began to feel energy bubbling up my spine. I found this interesting
but expected nothing more as I thought kundalini was just for saints. Then I had
3 dreams in a row. I dreamt of the goddess Isis, then I dreamed of a blue goddess
and finally of a really giant snake. The next day ad soon as I sat down to meditate
my kundalini awakened. The energy changed totally, it was very sharp and focused.
It whipped up my spine in a snake like motion, up the back of my neck and into my
brain, I was very scared! It spiraled round in my head and I could see it as light.
It went in my pineal gland spiraled on my forehead and then continued to my crown
and I felt the petals fluttering. I felt it exit my crown and somewhere above my
head I felt union occur and light fountained down. Then a circle of heat about the
size of a coin at my crown began to expand. It came down over my whole head like
a helmet. It was very hot and scary but not sore. Eventually it turned into light
and dripped down my body. I knew this was kundalini but a little part of me doubted
as I was neither mad nor enlightened:)! This was 2 years ago and I gave had various
phenomenon like explosions of light in my head, voices, OBE's ect. But as you say,
these are just sights on the journey and I don't pay them much attention. There
have been two events however that I feel were significant. The first was last year.
I was standing in a field at night admiring the stars. I began to talk to Shakti,
asking if I was on the right path, I said 'give me a signe'. Immediately a ball
of fire/light began to manifest in front of me. It grew to about 4 feet in width.
It then move across in front of me about 6 feet in the air leaving a trail like
a comet. I was left standing looking at a ball of light with a tail 150 feet long
before it vanished into thin air. I can't describe the incredibly beautiful quality
of this apparition only that it was unquestionably divine. For the next few days
I received a very strong infusion of Shakti like I was being stung with a thousand
bees. After this I knew it was true kundalini.
The second major event happened on the last winter solstice. I woke about 4am and
immediately knew there was a prescence above me. This prescence then flowed into
me. It was incredibly strong and thick it felt like the moon had melted into me.
There was an incredible feeling of love and for the next week I had Shakti moving
through me in a way I have never felt before or since. I even got very sick as my
body purged itself but the shakti kept coursing through me.
I receive many dream teachings. Last week I had three snake dreams. In the last
a huge and beautiful snake turned into a woman who took my arm and said she wanted
to be with me forever:) So I will continue with meditation learn from the teachings
I receive and not focus on phenomena. My only concern is what you say about the
Guru. I recently had a bad experience with a teacher/ guru. After this I decided
to be guided just by my kundalini and the inner guru. Is an external guru really
necessary?
Many thanks
Brendan
Here are my two discussions with Brendan.
1)
I have awakened kundalini for 2 years. Should I do yoga or meditation?
2)
Kundalini is my Guru: Do I need external Guru? Is Guru must for realization of the
God?
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Scary, Fearful Experiences |
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I am in a mess. Obstructed by unknown negative force, Please consider this as SOS |
I am in mess. Presently, my progress is obstructed by some unknown negative force.
I reach near oneness and unification and thoughtless state of mind, but some obstacle
from within obstructs. I crave for my unity still at a loss. Is this normal? I for
this reason psychological mess and unstable. Please consider this as SOS and attend
it at the earlier. Nearly 24 hours a day I have throbbing in my spine and something
jumps from down to my throat region. I do not know what and why. Please, please
do reply at earliest.
This is answered here
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Kundalini scares me! |
I couldn't open my eyes for an hour and water was flowing from my eyes nonstop.
Nobody knew what happened…You know when I closed my eyes it seemed there was just
me and Lord Shiva there, I didn’t see him but could feel his presence. My body started
trembling and I started crying little loud like a small kid. Inside me something
was loud saying "Shiva Shiva" for a long time and I had a very strong taste in my
throat. When it all ended after half an hour I couldn't open my eyes and my eyes
watered for few hours…I also felt like some insect is crawling on my leg or sometimes
arms. I checked the Kriyas I was doing was to activate chakras. One day in the evening
I finished my Kriyas and I sat on the sofa, I saw a demon half snake like in front
of me and all of a sudden it felt as if it entered my body and I felt very restless.
I stood up and put my head under running tap as I saw the mirror I felt it was not
me someone else. And I started making faces like that creature. It was really scary
though. And I felt if someone gonna come at my place I will kill that person. This
thing lasted for about 15 minutes. But afterwards nothing happened, that is the
one reason I stopped doing the Kriyas…..Now that I have reached this far I remember
God and tears roll down my cheeks asking God to show me a path. I don't want to
stop here. But without guidance I don't want to move forward also as I read the
symptoms of Kundalini scares me...Last several weeks/months I have not been able
to sleep at all. I generally go to sleep at about 4am and wake up at 6am. Life has
become a nightmare.
Update to this issue after several months:
I suggested a specific Bhakti Sadhana for this individual. She did it for
a couple months and all her issues were resolved. She wrote to me after several months: "Now
I sleep 9 hours a day
 ". The sadhana given to her
was similar to the
Upasana suggested here.
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Severe rash,
Frightening reaction to Shaktipat, I went to the emergency room |
I had a frightening reaction to Shaktipat from Baba Muktananda. That night I developed
a severe rash all over my body. I went to the emergency room and was given a shot
of medication. I did not have Kriyas or spiritual experiences. I learned that others
have had rashes develop after Shaktipat. I have asked Gurumayi, Swami Chetanananda
and Swami Girijananda, who was authorized to give Muktananda’s Shaktipat. Gurumayi
laughed and waved me away. Swami Chetanananda said I had received pollution from
living in India. Swami Girijananda said that people have different kinds of reactions,
and that I did not have a connection to Muktananda.
This is answered here
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Kundalini problems: Energy Imbalances affecting my Chakras |
I completed Rekhi Level III in 2000. I have severe Kundalini imbalance problem for
last 12 years. This happened when I was chanting Mahamrityunjaya Mantra which I
used to chant 540 times a day. It was in 2001 while I was chanting the Mantra, I
felt my entire body started burning as if I was engulfed in fire. I could feel the
intense burning sensation all over my body, more so in my palms. This continued
for to 5 to 6 years. IN 2005 I started doing Aulom Vilom Pranayam and then the heat
subsided to some extent. After that when my awareness started increasing I realized
that I am going through an extreme clairsentience (being able to sense psychic information).
Any energy in the form of pyramids, Ranta, smell, beads, Ragas, Mantras were affecting
my Chakras. I am in the state of extreme imbalance as of now. I feel scared, insecure,
and lethargic.
The Kundalini Shakti and the feelings are just too overwhelming for me. The Chakra
energy keeps changing all the time depending on the energy fields I am in. viz.
the smell of aroma oils, perfumes, colors, Ratna, Food, medicines, pyramids, crystals,
all Mantras and chants. Really I have no clue as to what is the path I should follow.
Most of time I spend in office I keep searching for answers. I am into Software
Industry and it is very difficult to concentrate and focus on my work because of
the experiences/imbalance I am going through. Feelings and emotions keep changing
all the time. But when I listen to my inner self I do feel blessed and see a purpose
for this experience. At the same time the imbalance does cause lot of discomfort
as I never feel normal.
Please help. I really need spiritual guidance for the path I should walking on for
my future journey. I would be really grateful if you could explain and guide me
to the right path.
This is answered here
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Energy overload: extreme pressure as well as headaches |
I have been a devotee of the Ramakrishna Mission for 19 years and have practiced
Vedantic mantra meditation for ten years. I also practice Qi Gong which is a standing
Dao meditation and healing practices of Chinese Massage/energy healing. I took initiation
from my guru when I was 17.
I have stopped all meditation and energy practices for now. I was getting extreme
pressure as well as headaches after doing meditation. My vision is double speed
or distorted frequently, my breathing is shallow, all my muscles are tightened up,
blocking my back and diaphragm and I am very tired all the time. My hands are swollen
with Prana at all times and I am not able to control my Prana anymore. These sensations
overwhelm me and make me paranoid, so I am barely able to function socially. I feel
detached from my body and from everything around me. My main symptom is that the
pressure in my head is so great that I feel cloudy-headed all the time. I don’t
really feel like talking to people and I have a hard time concentrating. It feels
like there’s already so much going on inside me, that everything going on around
me is just an overload. I don’t feel like my old self and I am unable to ever feel
a sense of peace. I have deleted all my social networks and have cut contact with
all my friends. I rarely leave my house except to go on walks with my father.
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Medical attention and treatment is the first option in such cases.
The long term solution is answered here
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